Friday Forward - Taking Shots (#518)

Success and rejection always go hand-in-hand

As we kick off 2026, I’ve been thinking about how I’d summarize my 2025. The truth is, I could tell two completely different stories about the year: both accurate, but very different.

In 2025, I experienced the most rejection I’ve had in my career. While promoting The Compass Within, I was turned down by more than 500 podcasts. Over 100 companies passed on bulk book purchases and speaking opportunities. I fell short of my book sales goal and didn’t make the New York Times bestseller list, a milestone I’ve doggedly pursued for several years. Around 300 people unsubscribed from my premium Substack newsletter. Several high-profile guests canceled on my podcast. Most pitches I sent were met with silence. I also received over 100 angry emails in response to something I had written in Friday Forward.

All of that is 100 percent true. But so is this:

In 2025, I sold more than 20,000 copies of The Compass Within in just 10 weeks. It was my best book launch to date, and hundreds of people I’ve never met emailed to tell me how much the book affected them. The book hit number nine on the USA Today bestseller list, a rank I’d never come close to before. I keynoted to over 40 organizations and appeared as a guest on more than 50 podcasts, both of which were new highs. My own podcast crossed 200,000 monthly downloads for the first time. More than 600 new subscribers joined the premium newsletter, and over 1,000 people wrote to share how a Friday Forward had made a difference in their lives.

That brings me to my biggest lesson from last year: the only way to open the door to more success is to invite more rejection. No one, no matter how successful or well-known they are, has a 100 percent hit rate. If you want more yeses, you must be willing to collect more nos.

This idea was at the core of one of the most widely shared Friday Forwards I’ve written, Five Nos (#386). The premise was simple: if you aren’t hearing no often enough, you’re probably not aiming high enough with your asks.

That post discussed an event I attended with entrepreneur Wayne Hoffman. Hoffman invited an audience volunteer on stage and handed them a two-sided coin, labeled “yes” on one side and “no” on the other. The rules were simple: the volunteer had thirty seconds to flip the coin as many times as possible. For every yes, they’d earn twenty dollars. There was no downside for flipping a no.

The volunteer jumped in and started flipping. By the end, they had landed seven yeses and about the same number of nos. Hoffman handed over $140 in cash.

The takeaway was clear. To get more yeses, you need more coin flips. The nos rarely cost you more than a few seconds of discomfort. But the yeses quickly add up to something real.

I worry that this lesson is not reaching younger generations. I genuinely feel bad for many kids today, growing up under the pressure to be perfect to get into the best school and get set on an enviable career path. A life of 4.0 GPAs, perfect résumés, and constant digital comparison has taught them that failure is something to avoid, even if it means not trying things that can be rewarding.

Most successful people have used failure to build resilience, or as motivational fuel. But for many young people today, rejection has become a source of anxiety and paralysis. What used to put a valuable chip on your shoulder now renders some people unable to get out of bed. Perfection can be cultivated early, but the real world does not offer much of it.

We need to help kids see that failure isn’t a death sentence. It’s part of the process of building grit, confidence, and, eventually, success.

As you look ahead to the year in front of you, ask yourself if you took enough shots last year or if you held back to avoid the sting of rejection. In 2026, the people who get the most yeses will likely be the ones who also get the most nos.

How many more nos might it take to get the yeses you want most?

Quote of The Week

“You miss 100 percent of the shots you don’t take.” – Wayne Gretzky

This edition of Friday Forward is brought to you by Shopify and Masterclass.

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